The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

The leaves are turning, the air, at times, has a simple chill to it, and pumpkins are beginning to appear! School is in full swing, my Friday nights are spent watching high school football games, Saturdays are filled with soccer and Texas Tech football, and Sunday afternoons are for the Cowboys (poor guys). You know, I have really never given FALL too much of a thought. It always occurred and I new that Thanksgiving and Christmas weren't too far behind. Today I found myself reflecting upon FALL.....I do believe, it has become my favorite time of the year!

Fall...Autumn.....whatever term you choose to use - it is a time of festivity! Every Friday night, sitting in those stands,surrounded by the fans and cheerleaders, is a very festive time! Looking forward to the half-time show and seeing my young man be a part of an amazing band while they dazzle their way through the show! Cheering my daughter on as she scores goals like she never has before in soccer is something I could do all day! Yelling at the television with my armchair coach of a husband while the Texas Tech Red Raiders show their stuff is something I could never replace! I am giddy just thinking about going to a pumpkin patch with my family! And who doesn't love caramel apples and pumpkin bread (well, pumpkin anything!).

So why all this hype about Fall? Well, honestly speaking. I don't know. It's just a time of the year that I have a "good" feeling. I'm busy but not stressed about life (work, maybe but not life)! The beauty around me is AMAZING and the festival of colors is heaven sent! So, for what it's worth..I do believe....this is the most wonderful time of the year! :)


"Just before the death of flowers, and before they are buried in snow, there comes a festival season when nature is all aglow." Author Unknown

Changes

Change - Not anything I ever look forward to. To be frank about it...I despise change. But what is that saying? Change develops character? I guess God decided this year that I needed character! I changed grade levels, subjects, principal, assistant principal, Jonathon started High School, and I pulled Clarissa out of the school where she had been since Kindergarten to take her with me to my school. I guess you could say, I am developing CHARACTER!

As hard as change is, I must say that I can now say it has been good! I am back in 5th grade where I have taught every year of my teaching career except one with a group of students that I adore! I love my team more than they realize! I am so blessed to work with two women who I consider to be two of my dearest friends! I have moved from being an English/Reading teacher to teaching Math. Yes, you heard me MATH!!!!! Can you believe it?? What is shocking is....I LOVE IT!!!! It is always hard getting a new boss because you never know what they are going to think of you or expect. Well, I must say I do believe we hit the jackpot with our new Principal and Assistant Principal. I have thoroughly enjoyed working under them so far! They are both Godly women and make coming to work a blessing!

Then there are my children! Jonathon started high school this year! He stays so very busy! As excited as I am for what God has in store for him, this time in our lives has brought about even more change! Jonathon and I have always been very close and with his busy schedule and his social calendar...I miss him. I never thought I'd say that about someone who lives in my own home but I do..I miss him. I love going to see him march at the games and practice at gym but our time together is so limited.

Clarissa, as many know, has had a very difficult time in school. Yes she had some academic struggles but her bigger troubles came socially. She has been bullied, left out, and basically emotionally beat down. On August 1 this year she asked her Dad and I to not send her back to her school. As a matter of fact, she begged us! After much prayer, we decided that I would take her to my school. For those that don't know, this meant she would be leaving one of the "most highly respected" schools in our town and going to probably the "poorest and LEAST respected" schools! This is what she wanted. I would be one of her teachers which was going to be a new journey for both of us. Well, there are no words to tell you how different she is! She LOVES school, she has many friends, her grades are good, she's involved in an after school club for girls and made the honor choir. I LOVE having her there with me and our relationship and changed drastically. She's always been a momma's girl but to say we have grown closer would be an understatement! Our home is a different place because she doesn't come home crying every day and doesn't fight us to go to school. Thank GOD for this change!

Change....it is just part of life. As I looked back over my older posts, change is what stuck out to me. My children have changed physically (and so have I- good and bad), situations have changed, struggles have changed, thoughts have changed. However, through all of it....I have been blessed!

Till next time.....

I'm Trying!!

I love reading blogs and I loved blogging.....HOWEVER, somehow, I haven't been on my blog in almost 2 years. I'm trying to get this 'ole thing fired up again!! We'll see what comes of it!

Dusting this 'ol thing off!

Well, it would be nice if I could take a 6 month vacation all the time....from work that is!!! I can't believe it has been 6 months since I have posted on my blog. I have returned to it many times during this past 6 months and have just stared. It was as though I had nothing to say (I know for some of you..hello!!! anyone out there.....that may be hard to believe!) I have just found myself so filled up with being a Mom. I had no idea the energy it took (takes) to parent a pre-teen middle school BOY! I had no idea the challenges that would come this year with Clarissa's school (more the social end of it) and how much it would drain from us. However, I've fallen even more in love with my children through it all. We've really tried to focus on them and making good family memories for them while not killing them in the process! LOL

So, I stumbled upon this 'ol blog tonight and something was different. Maybe it's the new year, maybe it's because really I love sharing STUFF that most people don't really care about, but I do, maybe it's because Texas Tech fired my favorite Pirate and you know I'm going to have something to say about it....but, whatever it IS...I've returned to blogging. I don't know how regular I'll be but at least it's a start!

Happy New Year! I pray that God blesses everyone in this new year before us!

Vacation

I am currently taking a blogging vacation. I have many projects going on and will share about them all when I return! We are doing some redecorating here at the house and preparing for a HUGE garage sale!!! I do have one quick thing to share which I will elaborate on more later! Two weeks ago we were at the United States Tumbling & Trampoline competition. I am so proud of Jonathon!!! He won the National Championsip in tumbling!!!! I'll have pictures to share soon! Thanks to all for being patient during my vacation. I'm loving being a wife, mom, friend, sister, and daughter right now!!!!

Rise and....RUN!!!!!

"Rise and Shine and give God the glory, glory"...remember that little tune? Well, this morning at my house it wasn't quite rise and shine it was rise and run!!

We are in the middle of massive clean - out, pull-up carpet projects in both of the kid's rooms so in the meantime, they are camping in the living room (which they love and which also happens to be right next to our bedroom). Last night I stayed up late, doing different things with the understanding that....ahhhh, Saturday morning.....I can sleep late! WRONG!!! At 6:00 a.m. I was awakened by hysterical crying coming from my living room. I don't remember quite how I got there...I remember my feet initially touching the ground to steady me as I flew out of the bed but between there and the couch....I remember nothing! I ran to the living room, swooped up my daughter who was standing beside the couch crying, and collapsed with her in my lap! With heart pounding I asked if she had had a bad dream and sure enough she had. So we spent some time talking through it, she went back to bed and so did the guys. With everyone asleep now.....guess who is wide awake?????

I guees this is a great time to go for me to starty laundry and go for my walk! Afterall, I've already had my run!

The Other Mothers

Hello everyone! Today's Coffee post is late and long....I hope you can stay around for it!

I love being a Mom. It is one of the hardest jobs (if not THE hardest) around but I love it. Even on the ugly days when I don't know what I'm doing, I love it! Then there is Mother's Day. I hae a different approach to Mother's Day than some. Instead of having the "day off", I like to spend the day with my kids. We go to church, go out for a picnic, and if the weather is pretty, we take them to the pool for swimming. I love to just "watch" them and I love to "be" with them. I am so thankful to God for my children and for the opportunity to be a "Mom".

For many of you, you know our story but not all of you know "the rest of the story". Before Sal and I got married, I knew that I would not be able to have a child (and he married me anyway...what a guy!). On Father's Day 1996, I prayed desperately to God to allow us to have a child. I knew that Sal would make an awesome Dad and I remember the words I spoke to God on that morning just as if I had spoken them five minutes ago..."Dear God, loving Father of all, you know the desires of my heart, and I beg of you to allow us somehow to have a child. I don't want Sal to go through another Father's Day fatherless. Through some miraculous healing of my body, adoption, or whatever path you choose, Lord I beg of you....please hear my prayers."

What a path we went on beginning that very day! We started an adoption process and were matched with a birth mom and in October of that very year, received the call that the baby had been born and we were quickly on our way to San Antonio. After 4 long days there, we learned that the birth mom had changed her mind and we were devastated. I can't tell you, unless you've ever walked in those shoes, how painful and how deep that hurt was. My sister flew to San Antonio to drive us home and Sal's brothers and sisters came to our home and took down the nursery. Today, I still get teary eyed thinking about how hurt, how sad, and how empty we were. We returned home on a Wednesday night and a very dear friend of ours came to take us to church. I also remember the pastor's prayer over us that evening..."God heal the pain, fill the void, and Lord we believe that you will fulfill the desires of their hearts according to your will".

We set out to heal, each in our own way, and in March of that year were approached by a 16 year old girl who we knew (I'll leave out the details of that for now). After much consideration, we committed to her to adopt her baby. I took her to every doctor's appointment and was in the delivery room with her when Jonathon was born. To add to this blessing, we took him home the Saturday of Father's Day weekend, 1997. God is good.

In May 1999, Jonathon asked us for a baby sister. We told him that we had to pray and if it was God's will, then we would have one. After two years of him praying daily for a sister, even for her birth mom, Clarissa Faith was born into our lives. Our experience with her was much different. We went through a wonderful agency in Abilene, we only knew about her for a week prior to her birth, and wasn't there when she was born (we were driving very fast to get there though!) I did have a very different experience though with her birth mom. She was 17, had had a very difficult life, and had no relationship with her Mom. She asked if I would stay with her in the hospital the night that Clarissa was born. So, over the next two days and nights, I took care of Clarissa's birth mom. The morning that she discharged, she asked the nursery to bring Clarissa to the room. She held her, she loved her, she kissed her, we took pictures, she kissed her some more, and then she walked over to me, placed Clarissa in my arms, hugged me and whispered in my ear "thank you for loving my baby and thank you for taking care of me". She then sobbed the deepest sob I have ever heard and walked out the door.

The journey to have our children was difficult. I've been told before that I got the easy way out because I didn't have to go through childbirth. Well, not quite. I had emotional childbirth three times, one that ended in death for us but two that are alive and well in our lives today. I could not be celebrating Mother's Day this weekend without some very special young ladies who gave me the greatest gift of all, my children. I have not seen or heard from either birth mom since the kids were born. That doesn't mean I don't think of them often. I get so many questions about adoption and I know that some people don't understand it, but for me, I'm so thankful that I couldn't have biological children because then I wouldn't have MY children. These are the children God ordained for Sal and I and they are 110% mine. However, that doesn't make me any less aware that I could not be celebrating this weekend, had it not been for "the OTHER Mother's" that loved them so much to give them the life they could not.

God is good. I will be forever grateful for my children but also for the journey He took me on to get them. I mentioned the adoption that fell through because I believe God allowed us to go through that situation so that we could see the power of His almighty hand. God is faithful, in HIS time.

This weekend as you celebrate Mother's Day, please say a prayer for all of those ladies (young and old) who have loved their babies enough, to give them them life and to allow other Moms to teach them to live that life.

"Faithful Father in heaven, I pray today for birth moms everywhere. I am thankful for the two ladies that allowed me to be a Mom to my beautiful children. As I rejoice and am filled with love beyond measure this Mother's Day, I would pray that they too be filled with YOUR love and YOUR peace. Bless them dear Lord and protect them from those that judge."

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11